Vulnerability

When I first began writing, I kept it a secret.

My friends didn’t know.

My children didn’t know.

Even my husband didn’t know.

It was just between me and God.

Then I felt God nudge me to pursue publication. I resisted at first. “But God, if I do that, people will know.” He didn’t seem to care.

So out of obedience, I told my daughter. (She was safe. She still thought I was amazing. COL! [chuckle out loud]) Then I told my husband. Then I went to an American Christian Fiction Writers group. And a conference. And so on and so on. Until I reached the place where the experts said, “Write a blog. Get an online presence. Put up a website.”

Do you know how scary it is for an introvert to put herself out there (actually, HERE)?

Who do I think I am to try getting published? How arrogant!

What if I fail? My friends will laugh at me.

Or my biggest question—what if I’m wasting God’s time? I could have been volunteering at a crisis pregnancy clinic, or homeless shelter, or food bank.

Last Sunday, my pastor used Matthew 14:28-29  as part of his text. “Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”

“Come,” he said.

It was Peter’s idea to come out on the water. Not Jesus’. But Jesus didn’t say, “No,” so Peter came. Peter learned a great truth and God received glory!

So I’ve been asking, “Lord, can I write for you?”

Thus far, I’ve not heard a no.

Regardless of whether or not I’m ever published. Regardless of whether or not people laugh at me. Please God, I’ll learn great truths and you’ll receive glory.

4 comments

  1. Rebekah says:

    Beautiful post. I’m more proud than words can say, Mom. Keep on writing and sharing; the world needs to hear the wisdom you have! 🙂

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